my words are my wishes, some use angry words as dark spells. i don’t like those words, they are so many of them, we have words for things which are no more, and things which are not yet. so many words to choose from, words for matter for spirits for feelings, and of course words for hatred, belittling but i don’t care that much about them. i dream and when i like my dreams, i tell everyone my dreams and sometimes they become real. bad dreams i choose not to give them my voice, be careful what you wish for they say
i wasn’t always like that, i have used dark words before to people i love, i have a skills, my words are strong, i know a lot of them so i choose carefully but sometimes i regret, i am lying, a lot of time i regretted. sometimes words take over when you are not careful, angry, anxious, frustrated, some words escape from your soul and rush to your mouth and you those rogue words you discover them at the same moment as the other one. it scares me, the other day i was talking to the guy who took my picture in the street, and he told me he just wanted to write about me without knowing me, a very shy man with not many words in his mouth but a lot in his brain, i can see those words in his eyes, scary eyes, he knows when it happens and then he hide his eyes behind a camera. he was telling me how he doesn’t own the words he used, that he feels like an experimenter creating things and letting them be, he told me how he doesn’t remember the stories but only the people. i asked him how can he do that, write without knowing…he answered it was a waste of time listening to people who don’t know themselves or worst pretending to be someone else, so he’d rather feel the stories. he doesn’t mean bad, he only writes about people he loves. i hope he writes about me few lines, i think i know who i am but maybe he saw something new, or something else. he is a strange man but i liked the time spent with his very sad smiles.
after talking with him, i thought he is a bit right, words are parked in your brain waiting to be used, to be given life, i didn’t realize that the evil words i have used where at my command, and yes they did become reality, and i have not spent a single day saying loudly how sorry i was to her